Home Is Where The Heart Is…

corniche

Corniche, Abu Dhabi (Photo by writer)


It is said that the place where you are born always stay with you no matter where ever you go.

I think it’s true and this I felt when I went to my birth place after seven years. It was like I knew this place and the minute I arrived there; I got connected to everything around me. I felt I have reached home.


 

khaliydiyah

Al Khalidiyah Park (Photo by writer)


The park in the photo is Al Khalidiyah Park, which is in Abu Dhabi. This park has been there for many years. I remember my father used to take me and my sister after coming back from office. I still remember vividly how I and my sister would run on the garden. We would go on slide and see-saw which were the best rides for us in those times.

Fast forward to 2015, I am a grown up person. And I was happy to find a small part of my past in the present. This park, where I had laughed and played, still exists. Now, the play part was replaced by brisk walking and jogging. I spent time with my parents and enjoyed every, single moment over there.

Although I live in Karachi now, the city that has my heart is my birth place — Abu Dhabi.

khalidiyah

Photo by writer

I spent my initial years here, made wonderful and beautiful memories with my loved ones (read cousins), attended Junoon concert for the first time, danced on my cousin’s wedding, had a childhood crush, watched Bollywood movies on cinema, talked about our future plans with my cousins under the blanket, had my Aqiqah (Islamic tradition of the sacrifice of a sheep or goat on the occasion of a child’s birth and distribute the meat to the poor), birthdays and what not…

I bid adieu to my birth place long time but still it haunts me ( in a good way). Abu Dhabi has given me so much more than this which will always stay in my heart till my last breath. It’s goodbye for now till I see you again!

Have you ever felt like this for your birth place? If possible, share it in the comment section.

 

 

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You Deserve To Be Happy…

 

madiha 1

Photo by the writer

Have you ever been in a situation where you feel you are no good? Has anyone made you feel worthless? Have you ever thought why you always feel bad about yourself? Are you doing right? Is all what is happening is your fault? Are you as bad as a person? Is something wrong with you?

These thoughts have all been with me for the past five to six years. Every day when you are told that you are a selfish person and you only think about yourself; gradually you begin to think that you are nothing but a useless person with no heart.

I had been there in that situation where I was constantly assuring and reassuring myself that it’s just normal to feel this way but fighting each day with these thoughts really consumed my energy.

Recently, Oxford Dictionaries has chosen toxic as its word of 2018. Toxic means poison and living in a toxic relation or environment suck the joy and happiness from within you and replace with anger and sadness. And who knows this better than me.

Let me tell you honestly, coming out of it was not an easy feat. It took me a while (read many years) to realise that I am not wrong but I am actually stuck in a wrong situation. The only thing which pulls me out of this mess was me! Yes, nobody can help you until you help yourself and that what I did. And the strength I receive, to do this, was one and only my Almighty Allah.

The best solution to come out of this poison is to surround yourself with your loved ones and say goodbye to those who add nothing but negative energy into your life.

  • Be with positive people, work and relation.
  • Explore the inner side of you which you have lost down the line.
  • Do not be scared to be on your own.
  • Learn to forgive yourself and the one who has inculcated toxicity in your life for your sanity (but don’t forget what that relation did to you).
  • Focus on the goodness in your life.
  • Keep in mind that you are not a bad person to leave this relation or environment, you have only done this for your mental and emotional stability.

And lastly, do remember, YOU DESERVE TO BE HAPPY!

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Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone Now!

 

highway-movie-hd-wallpaperI like the Bollywood movie – Highway – and especially this photo still (above). It was released more than three years ago. In this movie, the female protagonist (Alia Bhatt) discovers about life and herself.

There are several moments in this movie which I love; however, what piques my interest is that the character of Alia actually finds herself after she steps out of her comfort zone (in this case: her cozy home and luxurious life).

So, what is comfort zone? A place where you feel secure and at ease. It’s not bad right? I mean, you are comfortable, so you must be happy and content. Being in comfort zone indicates familiarity.  We live in the patterned world of our existence that keep us relatively comfortable and calm, and help us stay away from mental and emotional instability.

Unfortunately that’s not the case. The longer you stay within your comfort zone or in daily rut, the less happy you tend to be.

madiha 4The question is: If you want to stay in your comfort zone for entire life, then how will you know what it is like behind that invisible line?

“Move out of your comfort zone. You can grow if you are willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable when you try something new”. –Brian Tracy

The only reason that halts you to not cross that line is the fear of ‘what if’ you do not make it through. We fear to challenge ourselves mainly because we may fail or get hurt in the process. The problem is nothing ever grows when you stay in the comfort zone, except laziness, anxiety and fears.

higway 1According to wise folks, the only time you feel the magic happens is when you step outside your comfort zone.  Stepping out of your comfort zone is the most difficult task in your life and yet this gives you immense happiness.

It’s only when you push the boundaries of what you feel is comfortable, and challenge yourself to try new things.

When you go on an adventure, when you explore and experiment and, yes, take a bit of a risk; that’s when you learn and grow and, ultimately, you fulfil your passion and accomplish your desires and goals. You may have an inkling while moving out of your comfort zone but don’t fret because this is normal. Instead stand in front of the mirror and say it out a loud: ‘I am strong and I can do this, so bring it on!’

And who knows, you may also find contentment and meaning in your life outside your comfort zone just like the female protagonist finds it in the movie.

In Solitude, I Find Myself!

life hope 1

Photo credits: Online

A chaos filled inside me

No path is there to be seen

Everyday walking on a rough terrain

With nowhere to go, nowhere to reach

A quest of unknown territory

Feel a useless speck in a large scheme of life

Thoughts rampage and at the brink of insanity

Befuddle feelings and slow mind-numbing nothingness

Scary thoughts surround me everyday

Make me fall into deep pit

Complete meltdown and inability to face greatest life fears

Feed my addiction for perfectionism and measure my worthiness with material objects

No happiness, no contentment still I can find

Little do I know

In the midst of apprehension and uncertainty

I uncover my sense of purpose

All it takes a little digging to reveal the truth

In solitude, I seek solace

In solitude, I find myself

In solitude, I find God

The few lines above are my sentiments which I have gone through in the last few months. On the outside, I looked fine and healthy. But inside, a mysterious feeling was gnawing at me. I felt like my inner fear was slowly feeding on my soul. I was falling into a trap and nobody could see. I went under a cloak of invisibility. It was the time when I started listening and reading the materials that could inculcate some sense and relief to my mind and heart. And there it was, I read about Ishq Majazi (love for human) and Ishq Haqiqi (love for Allah). This made me see the world in a different perspective which I lost somewhere while living a meaningless life.

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Online photo

When you love a human, you have expectations and emotions which make you restless and anxious all the time. And with this love are associated desires and wishes that are endless. Your heart is always on the lookout for new things and there is no direction in your life. You are also likely to experience heartaches, discontent, sadness and a fear of being abandoned by your love in any time of your life.

On the other side, there is one true love which spreads tranquility in your life and that is the love of Almighty Allah. It is at the times of grief, one finds comfort in the remembrance of Allah. Love so pure and true that bring calmness in your life. Where ever you turn, you see Allah in every being and in every element of this world. The anxiety and distress are replaced by happiness and contentment. There is such sweetness and pleasure in the name of Allah that by repeatedly invoking His name, every sorrow is turned into joy.

The love so pure gives you direction and replace your heartaches with fulfillment which you may not find anywhere. This love enables you to forget about your self (Nafs) and think beyond your desires and do something meaningful. Your main and only aim is to attain closeness to Allah and to achieve that you perform acts that bring you closer to Allah.

This love is not easy to achieve and you may fail many times, you can lose your direction and there is a slight chance for you to bounce back to your old life. But not for long because the sweetness and pleasure this love has brought in your life, will not let you stay away. Perseverance, patience and tolerance are keys to success and this is what keeps you going throughout the life.

Embrace this love and allow to let go of all the negative feelings brewing inside you!

 

To Love And Be Loved!

life in perspectiveLast night, a random thought crossed my mind. When I shall leave this world who may shed tears on my funeral. My parents, sister and probably one or two of my closed relatives. That’s about it. I have a very small world which is good because less people you talk to, less drama in your life. But I also felt a pang of guilt that I am a selfish individual whose world revolves around I and myself. My parents and sister will feel sad because I am their blood. So it’s natural for them to feel that way.

Unfortunately, what is disheartening that I have never thought beyond my self. I have not helped any one ( and no monetary help is not what I am talking about). It’s about showing empathy to other people. I am not a bad person but in my life I have (intentionally) never thought to do something selflessly for other person. Not one moment I have given a thought to listen anyone or be there for a person. I always think that I don’t have friends in my down time but have I ever been there for them when they need me? Just to give a shoulder for them to cry on. The answer might be ‘No’… And not only friends, my fellow human beings. Doing something selflessly just to see them smile or even tears of joy makes all worth it. It’s as simple as that.

I believe that helping others is a great way to feel better about yourself. It can be a simple greeting with a smile, listen when someone talks, lend a shoulder to cry on, carry someone’s belongings to the top floor, run an errand for your aged neighbour, be a better friend or partner, cherish time with your parents, show concern to others and be compassionate, be gentle and generous even as simple as with compliments, be genuinely happy for others ( I know it’s hard but need to)… in simple words, find joys in giving and caring for others. Money buys you happiness but helping others will buy you contentment and satisfaction and probably few more people to shed tears on your funeral.

Realisation-an art to own fault and move on!

Hope gives you a reason to live

Hope gives you a reason to live

Realization is an art; it is learned only when you are ready to accept that whatever happens; it happens for good. This is no easy art because for an individual who is entirely absorbed in its past life, cannot realize that things or events were not meant to stay for long. Letting go is the next step after realization. Sulking over past will just make a person miserable as one is not able to concentrate on the present which is happening just now. The vulnerability of a person varies but only the learning of leaving past in the past will make it easy for one to learn the art of realization. This is not an easy task because it needs a lot of encouragement from within.

However the question arises that how can one learn to realize and starts making peace with its past?

Let’s say each passing moment adds up to your past. You have no control on time but yes! You definitely have a control over your decisions. One wrong decision and you throw your entire life into pits. Decision once made in your life especially a bad one can change the entire course of life.  You have to suffer the consequences of your bad decision whole life. After a while, you start getting irritated and in the meantime, your sleep pattern changes completely due to which you feel grogginess whole day.

Just let it go!

Just let it go!

But this is just a phase which can take only a day or few more days. The bad feeling depends on an individual because it is just a matter of ‘realising’ that now once the decision is made, either good or bad has been made, it cannot be undone. So why go on that path by which you cannot come back!

Life is made up of good or bad decisions, sometimes one fail and sometimes one just shines through. You don’t have control on time and consequence of your decisions. But what you have in your hand is to let it go and realize the essence of experience.

Each new decision teaches you a lifetime lesson but the moment of realization is within you. How soon you want to forget and carry on with your life which is slipping by your hand each day, entirely depends on a person. Once the art of realization is discovered, the path becomes easy to walk. Burdening oneself over the past’s triviality will only make one’s life worse and suffocated. Revealing oneself to the truth of life’s unpredictability will change the way of thinking, which ultimately helps one to move forward instead of lingering in the past.

So, embrace what comes to you because sitting back and regretting about your past is an easy way out but embracing the unexpected avenues of life will take you places. Carry on with the quest until you succeed!