To-do or not to-do

to do listMonday is start of the week. And after weekend, this is the day we all dread for different reasons; be it work, university, school or household chores. For past few days, I was all over the place and it is because I was doing everything on an impulse.

Therefore, I have decided to write a to-do list which will help organise my day. I used to follow this ritual before but then I left it.

Several studies have revealed that people perform better when they have written down what they need to do. This is because once you write down the tasks that you need to do, you are clear in your mind.

The best part is the internal satisfaction you get when you cross them one-by-one.

According to psychologists, writing a to-do list lessens anxiety, gives you a plan that you can stick to and is proof of what you can achieve that day.

To-do list is different from time table. You are not bound by time. You do things according to your own convenience. This is easy to follow compared to time table.

Here is to a new start and hope this will help structure your day as well as your life.

What do you think about to-do list? How much does this help you in organising your day? Share your answers in the comment section.

Jealousy Can Ruin Healthy Relationship

othelloOthello is one of the classics of William Shakespeare. What I like most about this play is the theme of jealousy depicted in the play, and is still relevant in the modern world.

Othello is a great and wise man, except for his blindness of thought and the rashness of action caused by his jealousy. He becomes angry when he sees a very small possibility of his wife, Desdemona’s infidelity.

Also, Roderigo is jealous of Othello’s marriage with Desdemona and he is blinded by his obsessive passion for Desdemona. However, it is Othello’s jealousy that brings about the destruction and tragedy in his otherwise happily married life.

The other theme more prominent is the psychological manipulation of Iago. He is the one who instigates Othello against his wife and loyal friend Cassio.

The foundation of healthy relationship is based on trust and sincerity. There is no room of jealousy in a stable relation. Jealousy is powerful. It can ruin relationships and make good, well-meaning people act in ways they never imagined like the heroic character of Othello.

Jealousy can make spouses abusive or in extreme cases, a killer. It’s important that partners should have open communication so that no one dares to sow the seed of jealousy or create misunderstanding in their relation.

Ready To Take That Leap?

life hope 1

At times, we hold on to people for so long; not realising that this may be suffocating the relationship. The fact is what is meant for us will not go away and what is not, let it go. Set yourself and them free so that you may see the bigger plan that Almighty has made for you.

We do know that this is going nowhere but we keep on lingering because we hope that one day things will turn in our favour. We pray and still see no result. We feel disheartened and want to shout and cry. I reckon there is nothing wrong to feel sad. It’s normal. However, nobody can understand our tears more than Almighty Allah. Indeed He is Al-Aleem (The All-Knowing, The Omniscient). He is aware of all things, even before they happen.

It’s true that brokenness and desperation lead us to finally let go to Allah and admit powerlessness. Faith is the only way that can bring us out from darkness. Believe that He can heal all wounds. We only need to embark on the journey for true surrender to the Will of Almighty Allah. It’s not an easy path. We may falter and lose. Knowing how difficult this may be, the question is, are we ready to take that leap? Am I ready to take that leap?

Sibling’s love-hate relationship

This article has already been published on Geo Vision website. I wrote this article for the website and now sharing a few chunks over here on my blog so that my readers can read. This was a different drama of its time produced by Pakistan Television Industry. 

meri behan maya“Our women are strong but in our serials, they are depicted as fragile and connivers,” states Hasina Moin, an acclaimed writer who has also written some of the epic dramas including Tanhayein, Ankahi and so on. After taking a long break, she started with the serial ‘Meri Behen Maya’; a story of two sisters where you saw the bond of love and support which unfortunately lacks in our dramas now-a-days.

So, what was the main concept behind writing Meri Behen Maya (MBM)? According to Hasina Moin, I feel really hurt to see women cry and wallow over petty issues, and unable to stand up for their rights, this is one of the significant reasons that compel me to resume writing again.

Women face domestic violence, they are harassed outside their homes and are treated as suppressive beings. Hasina Moin asserts that this is not the true picture that we see; she is of the opinion that these women have the potential and strength to uphold all the hardships with courage.

x1080-LeSMoreover, the other idea behind the serial is to defy the wrong depiction of sisters’ relation that promotes only hatred and nothing else. Hasina Moin believes that sisters do not deceive each other; rather they protect each other against the world. In her serial, she projected the positive side of sisterhood. One of the primary reasons to resume writing was to clear misconceptions regarding women, Moin adds.

MBM promoted the love-hate relationship between two sisters who at one moment were seen fighting with each other and at another moment they were sharing interesting stories while munching popcorn.

The portrayal of sisters in this serial was played by two female protagonists who are fearless and lively, and believe in living on their own terms. Annie Jaffri played the character of a younger sister Maya; she is upfront and bold, also expressive and does not conform to anything that she cannot relate to. According to Jaffri, the character is more like me, I am outspoken and love outings, even her family relate to her role.

Whereas Neelam Munir played the role of older sister Zarmeena; she is sensible and tries to cover Maya’s mess. Munir is the complete opposite of her character, and therefore she had to work on her body language, style and the behaviour. Munir shares her experience that to perform it accordingly, she observes her elder sister which helps a lot in understanding her character in the serial.

meri behen 5In replying to the question regarding the ‘look’ in the serial, both Munir and Jaffri say that western attire was more preferred for their characters, the decision was made after having a thorough discussion with the team.

However, when asked about the atmosphere on the sets and how did they find working with each other? Both female protagonists spoke highly of their team and they found it very helpful. Though Jaffri’s association with Azfar Ali is not new as she has also worked in Dreamers with him, so far it’s been good for her. Moreover, the teasing which was seen onscreen of both sisters was only for the serial, quips Munir and Jaffri with a smile; nevertheless on-set they both had a very congenial relationship.

The script was a refreshing one and every actor had performed well. Moin is all praise for the team. She had a very good working relationship with Iqbal Ansari who is also the Project Head of MBM; overall it had been a good experience.

untitledMoin signifies the importance of making children bold and confident, so that no one sabotages their rights and fight for themselves.

Seconding Moin’s opinion, Jaffri also says it is important for young girls to be strong in these times and do not give in. Munir on other hand believes that fathers should avoid second marriage and do not try to impose step-mothers on their children, it leaves a bad impact on the minds of the kids.

In a nutshell, dramas are always a revelation of our society, whether it’s good or bad but these days, where every other drama emphasises more on negative side of our society, Meri Behen Maya highlighted the ups and downs of familial relations.

 

 

 

Home Is Where The Heart Is…

corniche

Corniche, Abu Dhabi (Photo by writer)


It is said that the place where you are born always stay with you no matter where ever you go.

I think it’s true and this I felt when I went to my birth place after seven years. It was like I knew this place and the minute I arrived there; I got connected to everything around me. I felt I have reached home.


 

khaliydiyah

Al Khalidiyah Park (Photo by writer)


The park in the photo is Al Khalidiyah Park, which is in Abu Dhabi. This park has been there for many years. I remember my father used to take me and my sister after coming back from office. I still remember vividly how I and my sister would run on the garden. We would go on slide and see-saw which were the best rides for us in those times.

Fast forward to 2015, I am a grown up person. And I was happy to find a small part of my past in the present. This park, where I had laughed and played, still exists. Now, the play part was replaced by brisk walking and jogging. I spent time with my parents and enjoyed every, single moment over there.

Although I live in Karachi now, the city that has my heart is my birth place — Abu Dhabi.

khalidiyah

Photo by writer

I spent my initial years here, made wonderful and beautiful memories with my loved ones (read cousins), attended Junoon concert for the first time, danced on my cousin’s wedding, had a childhood crush, watched Bollywood movies on cinema, talked about our future plans with my cousins under the blanket, had my Aqiqah (Islamic tradition of the sacrifice of a sheep or goat on the occasion of a child’s birth and distribute the meat to the poor), birthdays and what not…

I bid adieu to my birth place long time but still it haunts me ( in a good way). Abu Dhabi has given me so much more than this which will always stay in my heart till my last breath. It’s goodbye for now till I see you again!

Have you ever felt like this for your birth place? If possible, share it in the comment section.

 

 

What Is So Great About Friday?

masjid nabwi

Photo by the writer

This photo is of Masjid-un-Nabwi in Madina. A place filled with tranquility and calmness. This is the beautiful gate of the mosque. It was a dream comes true when I and my parents prayed our Friday prayer here.

I have always loved Friday, the reason being the blessings which you receive on this day. The day is full of barakah and it only matters if you give importance to this day. I remember when I was in school; Friday was a weekend over here in Pakistan. I would wake up early and after my traditional breakfast of puri (unleavened deep-fried bread, originating from South Asia) and tea, I would take shower before Friday prayer, put on itar (scented perfume), and then I would pray. After prayer, we all would have a grand lunch. Those were good old days…

Now, there is no off on Friday, however, still I wake up early, take shower and then wear my nice clothes to work and I do use itar. This is the ritual I religiously follow even today as well.

For Muslims, Friday is a blessed day and we usually celebrate this day with religious fervour. We make sure to clean up nicely, go to mosque, listen Khutbah (Islamic sermon) and pray Namaz in congregation. It’s good if you also recite Surah Kahf and make sure to perform good deeds for example giving alms to poor and greeting strangers with a smile.

On a side note, do give some time to your parents because they are not getting young and you will regret it once you lose them.

 

Don’t Let Others Determine Your Self-Worth

life in perspective 1Care about people’s approval, and you will always be their prisoner.”– Lao Tzu

Are you kind of person who always cares of what people think? Are you always seeking approval from the people around you?

If that’s the case, then you deal with the fear of judgment. It’s irrelevant to let others overpower you with their opinions. Don’t want to complain but people will do talk about you. They always have. And they always will. No matter what you do or say, how you behave, the way you walk or dress, how you act, or the decisions you make, will always be scrutinised by others. It’s the social nature of people.

Similarly you are no less than them. You also say things to people (even though unintentionally) which they don’t like. I and you are not perfect individuals who cannot make mistakes. We are humans and so it’s normal.

The problem arises when we allow other people’s opinions to not only hurt us, but often times, to define us. We develop rage and resentment against people. Little did we know that all this will only weaken us from inside and nobody else…

In the past few days, I have realised that it’s difficult to let go of anger and stay calm in frustrating situation. But when we do suppress our anger and don’t let other’s opinion affect us, we feel invincible.

 

There are small changes you can implement into your life. One of the best things is not to worry what others think of you.

Don’t waste your time trying to get everyone to like you, because it’s impossible.

Focus on becoming a better person.

Spend time with people who can boost your morale (in a positive way).

Keep an optimistic outlook on life

Be there for people who need your support. And lastly, be grateful of what you have now.

Remember, some people will disapprove you no matter whatever you try to do. It’s important that you should not measure yourself by the standards of other people.

You should not depend on the approval from outside; rather you should embark on a journey of knowing your inner self. Question your thinking and identity and define your self-worth.